So a little over a week ago I posted about my top 10 films for last year. If only those had been the only releases in 2016. There were some major disappointments that not only t0ok advantage of my hard earned cash, but also wasted my time. There wasn’t a ton of agreement on my top 10, but I’m fairly certain this list will be very agreeable.
Note: Even if a film is on this list of disappointments, that does not mean I didn’t find it enjoyable or something in there to like. It just means my expectations were not met. 2
Star Trek Beyond – Dir. Justin Lin, Written by Simon Pegg, Doug Jeng
Of all of the films on this list, this is the one I didn’t expect. As they were announcing the team behind this entry in to the Star Trek film universe, I was pretty happy. Simon Pegg as the screenwriter (love that guy) and Justin Lin as the director (who has produced some pretty enjoyable work.) JJ was still involved as a producer and Idris Elba was cast as well. Everything was looking aces…and then that first trailer dropped. It was like a punch in the gut as disappointment came crashing down on me. Even Pegg spoke out about how crappy of a trailer it was. Yet I still held out hope that it was just crappy marketing and was not an actual reflection of the film’s quality. Turns out the trailer was actually pretty accurate.
Don’t get me wrong, I that the crew of the Enterprise were more than fine. There were some fun action beats. I liked idea of pairing Bones and Spock together for a large chunk of the movie. But everything else just felt…rushed. Rushed as if it was a TV show having to make an episode every seven days. That impression was so strong that the first thing I said to my wife as we left the theater was “I would have enjoyed it so much more if that had been the conclusion of several episode arc on a Star Trek tv series.” Sometimes what was born on TV, should stay on TV.
Independence Day: Resurgence – Dir. by Roland Emmerich, Written by over 5 screenwriters
I was not surprised this one was a disappointment at all. I full anticipated that it wouldn’t be a “quality” movie (this was a Roland Emmerich movie after all) but I was surprised on how it wasn’t a “fun” movie. The first film in this franchise is no brains, all fun (I still get chill’s during Bill Pullman’s “Independence Day” speech.) This one was still all brains, but the film forgot to be fun too. I was promised a fun, spectacle from each trailer that dropped…that’s not what we got. Now, there is a kernel of an idea in this film that I actually really liked and would have enjoyed seeing explored in another movie, but I highly doubt we’ll get that chance.
Suicide Squad – Dir. by David Ayer, Written by David Ayer
Ok, so where to start on this one? The first glimpse we got of this film told us we were in for a ride. It made us feel this was going to inject some life and fun in to the DC cinematic universe. Harley Quinn finally coming in to live action? Jared Leto coming on board as Joker (riding the high of a recent Oscar win)? Will Smith playing the badass assassin Deadshot? David Ayer directing, who’s film End of the Watch blew me away? Sign me up! And when still’s started dropping I was feelin’em. I thought they were pretty creative while still being fairly close to the comics (I particularly loved how they a direct translation of Katana’s look.) While I had issue with the lack of clothing for Harley (not because I was offended, but because I felt it could undermine the character) I was still on board. And then…the Joker picture. Oh man. That picture. It was at that point I felt the movie was in trouble. I know Leto wanted to go a new direction, away from previous incarnations, but there is something to be said with those other versions; they all worked. They all captured the core of what the Joker is. Caesar Romero, Jack Nicholson, and Heath Ledger (I’m also going to include Mark Hamill) provided a different shade to the same character.
But Leto decided to go “F*** that” and do whatever he wanted. His interpretation of the character had little to nothing to do with the Joker of the comics; it was like a meth addict who was trying really hard to be a crime kingpin who was always going to a Halloween party who threw temp tantrums like a 12 year old who kept losing at Call of Duty. Needless to say, he ruined the whole experience for me. And I haven’t even begun on the crappy editing, story structure problems, tone issues, horrible antagonist choice, logic questions, etc. But I don’t have the time. Just know this: This movie has a crap ton of problems.
X:Men: Apocalypse – Dir. by Bryan Singer, Written by Simon Kinberg
This one hurt. After the amazing X-Men: Days of Future Past (which was tightly directed, written, and edited) I was riding high on my love for X-Men. With this film and Deadpool as well, 2016 was looking to be a banner year for the X-Men cinematic universe. And the trailers and promotional materials had a few bumps (the purple Apocalypse controversy), but still managed to muster up excitement. I was so ready to declare this the best X-Men movie yet (as well as the most accurate in regards to looks; yay for comic accurate costumes!) but that isn’t what happened at all. The film lacked a soul; it was lifeless and paint by numbers. It was almost as if Bryan Singer and Co. didn’t really care about what they were making; they just wanted to meet a deadline. Oscar Isaac was wasted as the Apocalypse and the movie spent way too much time retreading old ground with the main trio (Lawrence, Fassbender, and McVoy.) It offered nothing we hadn’t seen before in this film universe and at about the halfway point I was begging for the movie to end. It was, for a lack of a better term, just plain boring.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice – Dir. by Zack Snyder, Written by Chris Terrio and David Goyer
If there was any movie on this list that HAD to deliver, it was this one. Announced to much hype at SDCC several years ago, this film was being portrayed as the epic of all epics in regards to comic book movies. Batman AND Superman in a film together for the first time? Loosely based on The Dark Knight Returns? This has the makings of something great! I was willing to give Snyder some leeway since A) I actually enjoyed MoS and his other big comic book film Watchmen and B) He has talent based upon his reimagining of Dawn of the Dead. And I was on board with the casting; Affleck as the Batman, Gil Gadot as Wonder Woman, and even Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor.
But then when the day came upon us for the world to witness BvSDoJ…we saw the mess that it was. YUUUUGGGGEEE plot holes, a unsympathetic Supes, a murderous Batman, and the worst conflict resolution ever conceived (“MMMMMAAAARRRRTTTTHHHHHAAA!!!!!!”) Once the third act was upon us, I didn’t give a crap about any of the characters. Every single one of them had infuriated me beyond forgiveness and I just wanted it to be over. DC had taken characters I grew up loving and made me almost despise all of them. So screw you DC, thanks for that.
Keepin’ it Geeky,